RESOURCES
Frequently Asked Questions
What is a relationship therapist?
In my practice as a relationship therapist, my main focus is on helping clients lift up the relationships in their lives.
While clients often seek support in a romantic relationship, seeing a relationship therapist can be helpful for many kinds of relationships. Along the way, clients will often discover what is going on for them personally that has created obstacles for having the kind of relationships they seek. For example, if a person is feeling depressed, we look at this in the context of their relationships. When this happens, we explore the obstacles with curiosity and then work toward shifting something for them that allows them to show up more fully in their relationships. An individually focused therapist will often address issues like depression primarily as an individual concern, and secondarily in the context of a client's relationships. My clients' goals are always about their relationships.
While clients often seek support in a romantic relationship, seeing a relationship therapist can be helpful for many kinds of relationships. Along the way, clients will often discover what is going on for them personally that has created obstacles for having the kind of relationships they seek. For example, if a person is feeling depressed, we look at this in the context of their relationships. When this happens, we explore the obstacles with curiosity and then work toward shifting something for them that allows them to show up more fully in their relationships. An individually focused therapist will often address issues like depression primarily as an individual concern, and secondarily in the context of a client's relationships. My clients' goals are always about their relationships.
For couples' therapy, do both partners need to come to therapy?
The short answer is YES.
It is ideal for both partners to be committed to therapy, and, for the most part, they will attend each session together. Within this, on occasion, there may be reasons to have individual sessions, which I will do with each partner equally, and only with a "no secrets" policy in place. This means that information shared in individual sessions will not be kept from the other partner. If this process feels scary to either partner, I support a process to help make this communication happen as safely as possible.
It is ideal for both partners to be committed to therapy, and, for the most part, they will attend each session together. Within this, on occasion, there may be reasons to have individual sessions, which I will do with each partner equally, and only with a "no secrets" policy in place. This means that information shared in individual sessions will not be kept from the other partner. If this process feels scary to either partner, I support a process to help make this communication happen as safely as possible.
Do you work with individuals?
(What if my partner or the other person in my challenging relationship cannot attend?)
(What if I don't want them to attend?)
(What if my partner or the other person in my challenging relationship cannot attend?)
(What if I don't want them to attend?)
YES.
I work with individuals who have relationship-oriented therapy goals. Here are some examples:
I work with individuals who have relationship-oriented therapy goals. Here are some examples:
- You would like to focus on a current relationship without the other person, because the other person is uninterested or unavailable or you do not wish to have the other person present. Here we focus on the client's own perspective and experience.
- You would like to learn or heal from a past or current relationship. For example, some clients have had long standing family relationships they wish were easier, better or more loving.
- You wish to change your patterns in relationships. A client may come to my practice saying they "always pick the wrong person," or they "get lost" as soon as they get into a relationship.
Do you work with families?
YES.
Some of the most dynamic sessions are with families, because these sessions encompass the many relationships between family members. My role in these kind of sessions is to learn about your family, be committed to staying neutral (not taking sides), and being curious. Together we can begin to understand what is happening underneath the disagreements and conflicts, creating a space for connecting more authentically and gracefully with each other.
Some of the most dynamic sessions are with families, because these sessions encompass the many relationships between family members. My role in these kind of sessions is to learn about your family, be committed to staying neutral (not taking sides), and being curious. Together we can begin to understand what is happening underneath the disagreements and conflicts, creating a space for connecting more authentically and gracefully with each other.
I heard you give a talk for singles who are dating online. Can I come see you and get more help?
YES.
If you would like support in the dating world, I offer both a personal and professional perspective. Keep in mind my focus - as a relationship therapist - is on how you relate and interact with others in the dating process. I do not help with profile writing or suggest particular websites. Topics include how and when to communicate, learning your own best timing communication, boundaries and safety.
If you would like support in the dating world, I offer both a personal and professional perspective. Keep in mind my focus - as a relationship therapist - is on how you relate and interact with others in the dating process. I do not help with profile writing or suggest particular websites. Topics include how and when to communicate, learning your own best timing communication, boundaries and safety.
Why don't you take insurance?
I value having the work with my clients to be unencumbered by insurers. This allows me to provide you with the best level of care.
Additionally, couples and family therapy is often not a covered treatment by many insurers.
Please also see the INVESTMENT tab linked below.
Additionally, couples and family therapy is often not a covered treatment by many insurers.
Please also see the INVESTMENT tab linked below.
What is Marriage and Family Therapy (MFT)?
See the bottom of the RESOURCES page.