Resources for Couples
-> scroll to the bottom for a video on What is Marriage and Family Therapy (MFT)?
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John Gottman describes one of his own stories about How to Build Trust in our relationships in the small moments when we choose to turn toward our partner.
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Here is a terrific (and lighthearted) video summary of The 7 Principles For Making Marriage Work by John Gottman.
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Good relationships keep us happier and healthier
...the biggest predictor of your happiness and fulfillment overall in life is, basically, love. |
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This blog post by Dr. Sue Johnson, entitled "Love is a Dance," speaks to the way we fight with our partners, and how we can change the conversation to feel safe and connected.
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It's my experience most couples would say they want to feel close to their partner, but what does this really mean? While we may know it when we feel connected (and don't feel), it can be more challenging to put into words what we truly and deeply want.
Take a look at Dr. Sue John's blogpost, entitled "What is a secure bond?" and see if this resonates with you. |
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This animated video "Brene´Brown on Blame" illustrates a portion of one of her TED talk entitled "The Power of Vulnerability."
In this entertaining video, Brene´ Brown tells a story from her own life that illustrates how fast blaming can happen, almost before we even know it. But what is REALLY happening, and what can we do about it...? Check it out. |
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How do we forgive our partner when we have been hurt by them? Does it seem like your partner's words of "I'm sorry" don't feel like enough? Perhaps a greater understanding of the hurt is necessary...
In this two minute video "How Forgiveness is Gained" Dr. Sue Johnson shares her research that has uncovered the one apology that works, which beautifully allows for recovering trust and connection with the one you love. |
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In this Washington Post article, marriage and family studies professor Matthew D. Johnson authored, " Why having children is bad for your marriage." He states research has concluded the relationship between spouses suffers once kids come along, and says that while parents are less likely to divorce than non-parents, those that stay married will be miserable together.
What do you think? Parenting is hard work, but is misery required? |
Photograph is from article webpage ( iStock).
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Bids for Connection. In his book “The Relationship Cure“, John Gottman writes, “But after many months of watching these tapes with my students, it dawned on me. Maybe it’s not the depth of intimacy in conversations that matters. Maybe it doesn’t even matter whether couples agree or disagree. Maybe the important thing is how these people pay attention to each other, no matter what they’re talking about or doing.”
Gottman discovered this about successful relationships: Healthy couples constantly make and accept bids to connect. |
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Always remember... |
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What is Marriage and Family Therapy (MFT)?
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Curious about how a Marriage and Family Therapist (MFT) approaches therapy?
This video produced by the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapists describes the benefits of working with an MFT, which includes these holistic approaches:
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